Dresscode?!

I heard some say "now that you’re a mom you'll be lucky to get out of your pj’s before your partner gets home." True that sister! I find myself giving myself a pat on the back if I change before noon. Who knew that brushing your hair and eating breast fast could be such a hard task, let alone cleaning and laundry?

Some tips to getting a routine that includes your own self hygiene as well as your babes: (this will get easier as your babe grows and begins to have more of a routine)

·         Have a quick or already prepared breakfast the night before- like a smoothie prepped in the fridge or apple one hand for the first feeding in the morning. So when your babe eats you can fuel yourself as well.

·         Your baby will survive if you take an extra minute to brush your teeth after using the rest room.

·         Before going to bed  clean one thing like your bathroom sink/ or putting dishes in the dishwasher/ or put in a load of laundry in

·         Prioritize your to do list- plan every day of the week to do the bigger chores

 

Now breastfeeding is perfectly normal and should not be a taboo. Women should be proud of breastfeeding but it seems as though society has made it seem like it’s dirty to do in public. As a new mom breast feeding in public can be intimidating. There are many clothing and camisoles to increase confidence when breastfeeding and not exposing the whole world your body.  I find once I was comfortable in feeding my baby in general I felt more comfortable in trying to complete this task in public without having the fear of flashing an old grandpa my boob, or having my mommy deflated tire exposed for half the food court to marvel at. Now I can, almost, find the humor in people walking by and at the last minute realizing that they were looking at my inconspicuous breast feeding ways.  Some people’s reaction is funnier than others- I have had many reactions the best is when the look like they have seen a jack-in-the-box for the first time and actually stutter step and almost bolt in the other direction.

                Have fun and good luck with juggling life with baby J

Thoughts of Life...

Last night I was lying in bed, after a completely exhausting day chasing after a 10 month old and a husband, what would life be like if…..I never met the love of my life. We never bought this crazy farm. We never brought life into this world…………The next thing I knew I was crying and mentally kicking myself for such thoughts. I wouldn’t rack it up to depression just the thoughts of pure exhaustion and it led me to think about all those other moms and dads out there who live a similar path in life.

Let me start by addressing the first thought ‘I never met the love of my life’. Well to put it simply I’d still be searching for him and probably performing my own Carrie Bradshaw life in downtown Calgary. Instead I met him 5 years ago and have never looked back. We all need support in our lives no matter if it comes in the form of a partner a parent or a community group; know you are not alone in life.

Thought number 2 ‘we never bought this crazy farm’. It’s true in September 2012 we gave up our suburban lives to raise a family on a beautiful ½ section near Brownfield Alberta. Who doesn’t love the idea of having a river valley in your backyard and wide open spaces for your kidlets to play. Yes it is a big change and we have our share of agreements and disagreements over everything from finances to what to do with the land. In all honesty I feel we were made to live rural and wouldn’t go back on the decision for one instant. In my mind there is nothing better than looking out your living room window and seeing your child playing in their tree house or eating sand out of the sandbox with Winston (our bulldog) right beside them eating along.

Finally thought number 3 ‘We never brought life into this world’. In one word disastrous. I believe without our daughter we would never be challenged to grow in our own minds, to play peekaboo for hours on end, to snuggle no matter what time of the day (or night) it is, to see my husband playing make-believe or reading stories about bunnies, and best of all to discover an endless amount of love and protection for a vulnerable being who relies on us for her every need (for now). There are bumps and learning curves in the road, but a wise woman (my mother) once told me to enjoy every moment because this too shall pass and they’ll be moving out before you know it.

I share these thoughts with you in hopes that you too will know that there is nothing wrong with tears and questions of what if; realizing that you are not alone in this world. Also to take a minute and cherish the moments and the adventures in being a first, second, third….time parent.

 

 

Returning to work...

Not only is today our first day after Christmas celebrations, but it is also the day we celebrate the 10 month birthday of our daughter. Now I could chat about how amazing and wonderful our life has been since she was born, but I’ve done that before; therefore today is about preparing you and your baby for that ‘dreaded’ day of returning to work.

For most of us the 10 month celebration of our children means the countdown to returning to work after maternity leave. For me personally I have mixed feelings as I can’t imagine not spending everyday with our little miracle, but I’m also looking forward to connecting with work peers and challenging myself on a different level of intelligence. Since moving out to the country I’ve noticed a dramatic shift in mindsets around working vs. stay at home moms. When in Calgary it seemed the norm for women to return to work after maternity leave, whereas out here it seems most women stay at home. For us we’re going to share the at home and work responsibilities allowing each of us to grow with our daughter and to also expand and challenge our professional personalities.

As I start to prepare myself to go back to work I’ve started to look into different recommendations for making the transition easier for our entire family. I’d like to share a few of those with you now.

1.    Encourage a bond between your baby and caregiver through play dates long before that return to work date.

2.    Get to know the daycare – meet the staff and spend some time in the new environment

3.    Send reminders of home – a favourite blanket, stuffy, song etc.

4.    Establish a morning routine to cue that it’s daycare or dayhome day.

5.    Maximize your time together – the household chores will wait while you snuggle and play.

6.    Minimize meal prep – frozen meals are great options.

7.    Give baby time to transition from caregiver to parent – allow time at the end of the day for your baby to switch gears back to being with mom or dad.

8.    Reconnect through touch – skin to skin contact, bath time, baby massages…

9.    Minimize night waking – establish a night time routine and how you’ll handle baby waking throughout the night weeks or months prior.

10. Share the night shift – if both parents are working away from home take turns responding to your baby’s night time needs.

11. Continue breastfeeding – if your still breastfeeding the first month of you returning to work is not the best time to wean as your little one will benefit from the bonding you share during ‘meal times’.

12. Cut yourself some slack – this may be a stressful time for the whole family, but you can ease this by dividing household chores and putting your time with baby first.

In conclusion make sure to acknowledge your own feelings. It is perfectly normal to miss your baby and/or feel upset; take time to talk with your partner as you continue to be each other’s best support system. If you’re going it alone, make sure you have someone you trust to talk with and don’t be afraid to shed a few tears during the process.

“Returning to Work” by Susan Spicer. Today’s Parent. January 2011

 

 

Breastfeeding

Breast feeding, although natural, it's not an easy task at first. It requires determination and perseverance. I still have those days of being unsure, is she getting enough? Is she urinating enough? Are my nipples supposed to look like that? I remember when we first brought our baby home. Not sure if she was getting enough we asked our midwife how long our little one should be at the breast. We got a "it depends..." my fiancé and I both joke about that answer... everything always depends, but at the time my fiancé was upset with that answer or lack of answer. "There’s enough research, we were able to send a man to the moon, but we don’t have an answer to breastfeeding...” We now realize just how different every baby is and develops. Breast feeding is not always easy. Here are a few tips I have learned along the way…

Ways to help make breast feeding bearable:
Be prepared- read up on breast feeding- what to expect, different techniques,& problem solving. For example: engorgement, low supply, know how much your baby needs at certain times in their life (newborns 1^st datys of life- tummies are the size of a chickpea so do not need much milk/colostrum until your milk comes in)

Have breastfeeding goals- how long do I want to breast feed for (the World Health Org. recommends at least 2 years) and being committed.
               
 Know where to go for help and what you can do to prevent problems. Le Leache groups are support groups for nursing moms.

Ways to increase breast milk production:

Drink enough of water

Relax

Ensure correct position and latch

Breastfeeding more frequently, it’s a process of supply and demand. The more demand increases your supply. (in your babes growth spurts do not worry about supplementing your body will naturally increase with more demand of the babes nursing)

Pumping after feedings to increase demand of milk.

Ways you may be sabotaging breast feeding:

Not consuming enough calories, while breastfeeding your calorie intake will increase in order to support your baby.

Supplementing with formula

Pacifiers and bottles- It is encouraged to not use any supplementation for at least 4 weeks postpartum to ensure good nursing habits and breast milk production.

Pumping your milk and not pumping while your away  at those times your babe is eating (this lowers your supply as you are telling your body your babe is not needing the feeds that the babe is getting from the bottle)

I hope this helps. Breast feeding is rewarding, but sometimes very frustrating. Sometimes you just need to vent or talk about your trials and triumphs, call a girlfriend. Hang in their momma, we have all been there.

The Strength Inside

“What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sometimes I think that labour and delivery was just the initial test of parenting. As I look back on my labours, reflect on the last 3 years of being a parent and look ahead to my future as a parent I can see all sorts of challenges that we have faced and that we will continue to face. I am truly thankful that through all of the challenges we have faced I have had my husband beside me and some very supportive family and friends. In addition to all the support networks I have, I enjoy finding inspirational quotes. This quote has kept me going on some of the most challenging moments and I wanted to share it with you all in case any of you are going through some of the trials of parenting. Always remember that you have the strength inside of you to do amazing things and to get through these trials, but also remember that you do not have to do it alone.

Baby #2?...

Growing up with 3 younger siblings always made me want a number of kids close together in age, my mom and dad had 4 under the age of 6 at one point. This may sound crazy to a few people, but a dream for us; kind of a ‘get it done quick and close’ type attitude. Now that our little girl is 9 months old, my husband and I have started the “conversation” of trying for number 2. With the joy of planning to expand our family come a few fears for me as well. Right now it is easy to spend time with and entertain one child, but what will happen when the next one or 2 or 3 comes along? Will we play favourites? Will we love them equally? Will they get along? Will their grandparents have big enough hearts for more than one? Sometimes I sit down and cry as I stress myself out with these thoughts, but the answer is simple: yes they will be loved equally by all and yes they may fight at time, but in the long run they will always be there for each other and in our minds there is nothing better than a big family.

Other news on our front is that my youngest brother and his wife are expecting their first as well, a boy the heir apparent at this point in time. Again I’m thrilled for them, but also scared of how this will affect my own little girl’s position in the family. Needless fears and anxieties I know, but real ones none the less. After a wonderful conversation with my mom, I was assured that our little girl will always be loved and how exciting is it that she’ll be the first to ride in the sled, build a snowman, tease the puppy, drive the quad, race down the ski hill and shoot a gun with her dad (my husband added this one).

Coming to mental peace with myself over these crazy thoughts and concerns, I am more than thrilled to add to our family and keep all the little siblings and cousins close together in age.

In ten years when there are 12, yes that is what we all promised 12, grandkids running around at Christmas ask me if I have any regrets and despite pure exhaustion I will tell you NO.

Baby Joy!

Although my babe is only four months old, I seemed to forget how little and fragile brand new babes are. Today we visited our close friend’s with brand new little girl and how precious. What a miracle child birth is and how special every little baby is. I feel so blessed to have my girl and for her to have a new bestie!

Looking at that tiny little miracle and holding her little body in my hands I quickly remembered all the new and challenging experiences of when I first held our babe in our hands for the first time. It seems so long ago, how quickly things change. Like when we didn’t even know how to unlock our car seat from the base at the hospital bringing her home. Or when it took both parents to change a poopy diaper and in the lengthy process almost getting pooped on! Or breast feeding, hah…

As a nurse one would think I would have a one up, but I think all new moms can say most education goes out the window and intuition plays a huge role. I also feel so blessed to have had such a wonderful man by my side and a helping/willing mother with us for support those first few days of uncertainty and new territory.  Having a support team is wonderful and it is so exciting to share a wonderful addition with family and friends. Enjoy every moment.

New Year, New Me!

As the New Year has arrived, I have been contemplating a bit on where I am in life and where I want to be. I am not big on making new year's resolutions because I honestly never keep them- I don't really like to go to the gym or diet. I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I don't really have any big vices that I can try to give up….So my "Non New Year's Resolution" is to improve myself. I want to be a better person. I want to strive to be a better parent- take more time for my kids, teach them more and enjoy the little things in life with them more. I want to be a better wife- take more time for my husband, get back to enjoying the things we used to enjoy before kids/work/life happened. I want to be better at taking care of myself- take time for me, focus on things that make me feel better and develop my passion for scrapbooking and photography more.

What about you? How does the New Year look for you? Have you made any resolutions? If so how are you sticking to them?